Sink or Swim

I know it’s been awhile since I’ve posted. I’ve been busy trying to make my apartment livable and doing end of the month comments and schedules for September at school. One month ago today I was on a plane on my way here. It’s hard to believe it’s already September. I had a pretty quiet weekend which was much needed. Sometimes I need to retreat from everything and just spend time not talking to anyone and recharge, which is why I’ve been decorating my cave and trying to make it comfortable. The city is smelly and noisy and smoggy, so it’s really important for me to have somewhere to hide when I need to.

Last weekend I went out in Songtan on Friday night with a big group of teachers. It was someone’s birthday and someone else’s going away party. Songtan is a curious place…It is right near one of the US military bases and therefore it is mostly military people and wives/girlfriends in that area. Most of the bartenders speak English and there are tons of international restaurants. It’s bizarre to see so many non-Asian people in one place. Sunday I took the train into Seoul with one of my new coworkers. It was his first time there so the responsibility of navigating was left up to me which was a scary thought. We went to Itaewon which is another very Westernized area and had brunch, and then to the Seoul Museum of Art where we saw a Gauguin exhibit. It was a perfect way to spend a Sunday.

Time to get a bit personal here, I wanted to talk a little bit about having the courage to take risks and have new experiences without sounding too preachy. When I was still in school, I fantasized about dropping out and using the rest of my tuition money to travel around. I am truly glad that I stuck it out and finished my degree. Graduating is a scary thing because for the first time in life, you have the freedom to choose what your next step is (or maybe not since the job market sucks right now). For all of these years, all we had to do to prepare for the upcoming year was buy supplies and textbooks. Now what? Well….whatever you want. I used to peruse Facebook and feel envious about everyone who was taking off on these amazing adventures all over the world. So when I happened to stumble across the job post for teaching in Korea, I thought to myself that I could either keep living vicariously through other people’s adventures or I could take that leap and create my own. Maybe your goal or dream doesn’t involve travel. Which is fine, it’s not everyone’s preference. The point of this little pep talk is just that you seize every opportunity and take the first steps towards whatever it is that makes you happy or that you’ve always wanted to try. Stop talking about it and go do it.

It’s so easy to stay where you’re comfortable or to make excuses. One of the main excuses is “I can’t afford to……….”. The reality is that people spend their money how they choose to. Is that another pair of shoes you bought? Another $30 lipstick? Another night out drinking yourself silly? I truly believe the saying that once you decide to do something, the whole universe will conspire to make it happen. You are more capable and resilient than you think you are.

2013 has been a rollercoaster so far, in the best way possible. I just feel like my life is playing out exactly the way that it’s supposed to and that things have come full circle. Leading up to my departure, I had several life changing conversations with a few different people. Maybe you can relate. Have you ever had that moment of clarity where something just clicked with you? A new perspective or opinion was presented to you that brought you great peace? Well that’s what happened for me. And that is part of what amazed me and gave me the tiny push that I needed to go through with this, was seeing the amazing outpouring of support that I got from everyone. Not at all the reaction that I was expecting, which brings me to my next point:  People will constantly surprise you, that’s why keeping an open mind is so important. Don’t be afraid to ask tough questions or seek the answers you’re looking for. You may get them somewhere unexpected or from someone unexpected. I will always always be grateful for the support I’ve received this year and in this journey. You don`t have to try to tackle your goals entirely on your own, find your voice and ask for help. But then find a way to pay it forward and help someone else live their dream.

Often, your fear of a particular outcome or repercussion is much worse than what actually happens. If you go into something with an open mind, positive attitude and a little determination you will always win. Even if it doesn`t turn out exactly as you thought, you still learned something. Weigh the pros and cons of whatever it is you really want to do. If it`s not illegal, if no one could end up hurt or dead, if you won`t wind up swimming in debt if it doesn`t work out, then take a chance and do it. There is nothing more tragic than wasting years of your life doing something you hate or with someone you don`t want to be with because you`re scared of change. I have so much respect and admiration for people who go off the beaten path and follow their passion. Okay I apologize for this totally cliché motivational life speech but I hope it speaks to someone, somewhere. Next post will be lighter, I promise!

Miss you all! Keep Skyping and sending messages!

xoxoxo